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death.

i lost my granddad. most terrible times i've ever spent, been spending.
i was away, in another city, for nearly 10 days.
terrible things happened.
terrible things keep happening.
i dont know what will my grandmom do by herself, alone...
she doesnt wanna leave her house ever.
i dont know what will happen to my granddad's store...
weird things keep happening about it, and i cant believe what i've been seeing lately.
truely, i dont wanna believe what my eyes has seen and my ears have heard.
i feel depressed.
i feel like, i have noone to call and tell how unhappy i am,
coz probably noone will ever understand.
this is not anyone's fault i guess, it's just
i am always unable to show my feelings during my daily life, i usually smile so unnecessarily much.
...and i keep complaining about stuff which are really not that important.
well, anyways...

for 10 days.
i was away from everything.
now, everything feels so weird.
internet,
people i know,
people i dont know,
people i thought i knew
and normal vegetable meals...

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